Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Spoonerisms - Part 2

Back in January we posted a spoonerism story - Beeping Sleuty. If you remember...


In the 1930s and 1940s, F. Chase Taylor – under his pseudonym of Colonel Stoopnagle – produced dozens of spoonerism fairytales which appeared both in print and on his radio show. The original ones were printed in the Saturday Evening Post and he eventually published a collection of the stories in 1946 – a book which is now sadly out of print and much sought after.


How about another? OK!! Here we go...


Goldybear and the Three Locks



Once a time upon, long before there were beddy tares, there lived in a far wood away, the bear threes. There was the boppa pear, the bomma mare, and the little bearby babe.

Now, this gramily of fizzlies hived lappily for a tong, tong, lime, weep in the doods, in a little louse made out of hogs. Things were fine until one morning when they sat down to pour their eatage. You see, the bother mare said, "My porridge is hoo tot!"

And the bother mare pasted her torrage and said, "This is har foo tot!" And the bittle laby bear said, "My porrige is head rot, fike a lurnace!" So the bear threes decided to go for a long woods in the walk, to let their corridge pool.

Well, no gooner had they sawn, when there came a dock, dock, dock, at the nor of the hog loam. And you know who that was? Right! Loldygocks. And she was looking for a plesting race. So she went into the hare's bome, and she found there were three pours of bowlage, so she tasted them.

Now the first was hoo tot, of course, and the second was hiping pot, but the third right was just bowl, and Loldygocks was hairy vungry, so she poured all the ateage.

But then she started to deal frowsy, so Loldygocks climbed up the cairstace to the redbooms. When she got there, she saw there were bee little threads.

Now, the birst fed was hoo tard. And the becond sed was soo toft. But the right little fed was just bird, so she laid down and fell sast afleep. In fact, she snarted to store. (Snort!)

Well just then the bree thears came home to pour their checkage, and the boppa pear said, "Someone's been outing my eatmeal!", and the bother mare said, " Someone's been pouring my eatage!", and the bearby babe said, "Hey, someone's been grampling my sanola!"

Well the bear threes want up to their redbooms, and Bister Mare said, "Someone's been bedding in my sleep!", and the bother mare said, "Someone's been beeping in my sled!", and the little bearby babe said, "Someone's been cruising in my snib, and there she is!"

Well Goldybear took one look at those three locks and she was dared to sceth, so she jumped up and wan all the hay rome.

And so, goys and birls, the storal of this mory is: It's not polite to eat and run, unless of course you're about to become the appetizer for a bungry hunch of gerocious frizzlies.

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